Incident #24

This morning while getting ready for work I suddenly realized I had been standing in the middle of my dining room staring off into space for an unknown period of time. When I did become aware of this I felt obligated to start moving again but couldn't remember what task I had been in the middle of. I needed coffee.

Incident #23

Today I arrived at work and tried to log on to my computer. After quite a few failed attempts I was growing increasingly frustrated as I slowly and aggressively typed in each letter of my username and each letter/number/character of my password double checking the whole time that I wasn't missing a single stroke. As I began dialing our IT department I realized that I had spent the last 10 minutes trying to log in to my work computer with my personal email username and password. I tried with the correct username and password and the computer "Welcomed" me. I needed coffee.

Incident #22

I woke up this lovely Saturday morning and as per usual headed right to the coffee pot. As I was about to put a filter in, I noticed the filter cup had coffee grains in it, I then took it out so I could clean it. Upon getting to the sink I saw I had dishes from yesterday so I got distracted and started cleaning them. When I got to a coffee mug I remembered I needed to make coffee. I went back to the coffee machine and ground my beans, put it in the filter, filled it with water and put the pot back under the machine and pushed start thinking everything was in its place. Then I went back to dishes (holy productivity pre-coffee!) and that's when I picked up the filter cup and gave an awkward look back at the coffee pot which was spitting coffee and ground beans all over the counter. I needed coffee.

Incident #21

This morning I woke up and discovered my coffee grinder had gone on strike (stopped working). First I started chopping my beans but that was taking far too long. Suddenly an idea popped into my head. Now usually I ignore all "ideas" that I come up with prior to coffee for my own safety, but I was desperate. I grabbed my food processor and began putting it together. It was going just fine until I tried to remove the unneeded slicer and slice indeed it did, to my finger. I needed coffee (and now stitches).

Incident #20

I woke up late this morning and decided I'd grab coffee on my way to work. I rushed around my morning routine and grabbed my car keys and off I went without any bumps. Until my house came out of nowhere and attacked my passenger side mirror on my way out of my drive way. A little bit of duct tape and some curse words later and I was on my way again. I needed coffee.

Incident #19

This morning I made coffee as per usual and then got dressed while I waited for it to brew. When I returned to the kitchen there was coffee all over the counter and floor. I had forgotten to put the coffee pot back into the coffee maker. I needed coffee.

Incident #18

I went to Lowe's (because that's the best way to start out a Sunday morning) for various items for my rental unit. I picked up some paint and the Lowe's employee asked me what I was painting. I replied with what I thought was a reasonable answer "A wall." She looked at me as if I were crazy and said "I would hope so!" followed by laughter. Apparently I was supposed to be more specific. I just didn't understand. I needed coffee.